Talkin Trash

A few teams got completely eliminated this week from playoff contention and they deserve to be recognized for their futility. Congratulations go out to The Foreigner, Bucking Broncos, Hey Reb, and Shimrp Shack II. All of you are officially out of the running and have zero chance of making the playoffs. You may still play a role as a spoiler but that is all. What's pathetic and sad about this is the fact that Gregg with a 4-8 record still has a chance to make the playoffs. That's just not right. A few changes will be made next year to ensure that crap like this doesn't happen again.

Because I'm so full of myself and love me some me, I'll start off by gloating about how wonderful my team is and their massive destruction of Keler's crappy team. 125 points is no joke and having it come against Keler only makes it better. Not sure if you guys saw this clip, but if you replace the word Utah for Keler, that's about how I feel. If the season ended today I'd be the wildcard team and a serious contender to kick some trash throughout the playoffs. I would like to also point out what a genius I am by picking up Mr. Forsett with the Seahawks who must've known he was on my fantasy team because he went off for 25 points. Thanks Justin! I appreciate the big day. As for Keler, we appreciated having you in the league. We kind of miss not having you in Las Vegas anymore and wish you the best of luck in UT.

Barely Legal is barely alive after the wallopping defeat he suffered at the hands of Mr. Kung-Fu 4-8 Ninja himself. The Japanese Turd saw a small chance at making the playoffs so he decided to put in a real lineup. Way to finally pay attention to your team and make some educated moves. It's too bad it was temporary and next week you'll return to loserville. I say that because picking up Marshawn Lynch is more of a deathtrap then anything. There wasn't a single move that could've helped Barely Legal win this past week, unless of course you take a look at every single move Alan made over the course of the year to realize that there were plenty of opportunities for him not to suck as long and hard as he did. Alan has enjoyed both ends of the spectrum (which isn't surprising). He started off the year 4-0, only to lose 7 of the next 8 games. Not a winning recipe.

Next we come to the dreadful attack of Psycho / Señor Sarcasm who strikes yet again. Señor makes the wrong QB decision, again, yet continues to pile on the points. I don't think there has a been a week all year where there wasn't a QB on Sarcasm's bench that didn't score more than his starter (or more than Alan's mom). Zylka finally put Erica's team out of their misery. Erica's dreadful team is on par with the Detroit Lions, Cleveland Browns, Oakland Raiders, St. Louis Rams and Kansas City Chiefs. Your team is like a trainwreck. Every team in the league couldn't wait to face your pathetic team. Every team you beat has a losing record and you only put up 100 points once. I know the blame isn't Erica's but her sports fanatic husband who is obviously dealing with other issues because it's quite obvious that fantasy football is not a priority.

The caveman's wife did some butt kicking over the weekend. Nice time to put up 109 points. You didn't pay attention and still wracked up 109. Just imagine what you could've done had you not paid attention all year long. (Instead you have most recently been paying attention to Muse(seriously, $500 to see those guys?), some stupid British band that you haven't decided you liked until 3 weeks ago and now you are willing to fork over your life's savings to see them. That's not random is it? Afterall, music is your life. Music and cavemen, along with clockmaking and devil worshiping.) It's not surprising however that you'd over analyze every possible decision and ultimately make the wrong move. What is surprising is that Joyce's team didn't pounce you. She had been on a nice winning streak that was suddenly slapped into hysteria. Joyce's key weakness has never been more obvious. Girl, you need yourself a quarterback. Almost anybody else is better than who you got.

This weeks sign that good works are not dead is brought to us by Leo. After realizing that with a few wins and a little bit of luck Leo could make the playoffs, he promptly puts up the second lowest point total of the year so that Doron can make a playoff run instead. And you said that Leo was a bum! Had he played basically anybody than who he did, he would've won. Instead the mamba lucks after starting an injured QB and then takes a stab at voodoo which worked out well too as Leo's QB promptly had his foot fall off thereby enabling the mamba to win.

Finally Tony's continues to assert his dominance by embarrassing Bo and her Broncos. Tony has been hotter than two squirels screwing in a wool sock lately by putting up more than 100 points 6 of the last 8 weeks. Bo's team has been colder than a penguin getting left out of a love triangle in Alaska. Things in Bo's world have been tough on her and there's no need for this blog to add any more pain to Bo's world so we'll end it like this.

On that note, enjoy a laugh by watching this clip.